"Inappropriate touching" has become a reoccurring issue in my classroom over the past week or two. Today, one of my students stood in line with his hands inside the back of a female-bodied student's skirt.
Instead of scolding him for the umpteenth time for what is quite honestly a developmentally normal process of body/gender awareness, and yet again shaming him for his sexuality during a time that is critical for establishing early sexual attitudes on such things as the opposite gender and nudity, I decided to provide him a lesson on consent.
The lesson was a simple one. If you want to touch or hug a friend, you have to ask, first. If he or she says "yes," you can go ahead and touch or hug them. If he or she says, "no," you must keep your hands to yourself. By the end of the day, the word had somehow spread without my knowing, and I was amazed at the conversations I was overhearing.
"Can I touch your shoulder?"
"No."
"Okay, can I touch your head?"
"Yes, you can touch my head."
"Okay, I'm going to touch your head!"
"Can I give you a hug?"
"No, I don't want a hug."
"Okay."
Okay.